Monday, April 30, 2012

weekend wrap up / part one

This past weekend we took a quick overnight road trip to Eastern NC. I took a gazillion pictures (surprise, surprise) so I’m going to break this down into two separate posts.

Saturday morning we woke up, loaded up the car, and headed to Greenville, NC home of our alma mater East Carolina University. We are die hard Pirate fans, and love going back to Greenville to enjoy football and baseball games when we can. We were also both heavily involved in the university’s athletics while there, so its nice to see familiar faces and see how the programs have grown and changed over the years.

On Saturday, the ECU Baseball team was playing Tulane in a 3 game weekend series, so we were able to see the one of the games. The team is currently ranked 27th in the nation, Go Pirates!

All pictures from Satuday are from the good ol' Iphone...I felt silly carrying my ginormous camera in to the stadium, the Iphone is so much more discreet!

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The long trip there…sleepy baby and bored momma! Eastern NC is wide open, and there is a lot of nothing in between Raleigh and Greenville. Driving Highway 264 is the longest, most boring part.


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This is apparently how we choose to wear out bibs now.


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Ready for some Pirate Baseball!


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Silly baby…he was so interested in everything going on.


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Beautiful Clark LeClair Stadium


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Family photo opp…Landon is chewing on Sophie the Giraffe’s feet for those of you wondering. He loves it. Whatever makes the kid happy, lol.


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Love my baby boy!

Unfortunately the Pirates lost, but over all it was a really fun day for us. We took a quick drive through campus to walk down memory lane, enjoyed a great atmosphere at the ball park, and then loaded up the car and headed to our next stop, Southport, NC.

Stay tuned for the second part of our trip! :)

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

WW/ Three years ago

April 25, 2009

I really cannot believe it has been three years since John and I said our vows. We have had such an amazing, fun, and challenging three years. I can honestly say that there is no one else in this world I would want by my side to conquer the things life has thrown at us over the past few years. His constant optimism and faith that things will work out for us continually amazes me, and keeps me going. I am so blessed to call him my husband.

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Happy Happy Anniversary to my husband.
Here’s to the rest of our lives.
I love you.

Sunday, April 22, 2012

silhouette sunday

One downfall of always being the one behind the camera…there aren’t many pictures with me in them! I’ve been wanting to try some silhouette images of Landon and me and just haven’t ever gotten around to setting up the tripod and giving it a whirl until today. Its rainy outside, and the house is dark so the only light coming in is from the windows. I really hoped to try this with sunsets, but unfortunately we live in a highly wooded area and I have yet to find a place where I can see the horizon clearly.
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I think the last one is my favorite…that sweet little noggin!  Hopefully I can find a good place to try this out with the sunset!
Happy Sunday y’all!





Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Dear Landon/Four Months


Dear Landon
Happy Four Months baby boy! This past month has been so fun with you.
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In your fourth month…
You eat 5-6oz of milk every 3-4 hours.
We gave up breastfeeding and switched to formula, which was such a tough decision. When I went back to work you weren’t satisfied anymore, and between the pumping and nursing and twelve hour workdays I couldn’t keep up…however you have done really well on formula and seem much more satisfied with the bottle! We still are able to give you a few ounces of breastmilk a day from the freezer stash, so that makes me feel better!
You are wearing six month sleepers…and quickly out growing them. You can still wear most of your three month onesies, but I put you in six month onesies most of the time for added room. You wear six month pants (because of the length), but your shorts are 0-3 months because of your skinny little waist. You are long and lanky just like your daddy.
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Sleep has been an issue. Around 13/14 weeks you started waking up much more frequently in the middle of the night. Previously you slept for almost 8 hours, now it is a five hour spurt and then you are up every hour or so from about 2am until 6:30am when we finally are up for the day. I have read about four month sleep regression, and am hoping it is that, a growth spurt, or just a change in development and that you will grow out of it. Mommy and Daddy are tired!! The past few nights (knock on wood) You have woken up once around 2:30 to eat and then sleep until about 7, so hopefully you have outgrown that little stage.
You nap about 3 times a day, anywhere from 30 minutes to 1.5 hours.  We are working on napping in the crib. You don’t nap very long if you are there versus the swing, but it is so nice to be able to use the monitor and get more done around the house if you are in your crib.
You still love “superman” and giggling…it melts my heart.
You are beyond ticklish, just like me. I can always tickle your little belly or back and get you to squirm and smile.
You like bath time!
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You found your toes…and are fascinated by them. You also try to put them in your mouth (like everything else you can get your little hands on!).
You celebrated Daddy’s 28th birthday on April 5, and your first Easter on April 8th. You did so good during church, which was a relief.
You found your voice. Definitely. You can be one noisy baby when you want to be! But I love hearing you when you “talk.”
You started riding in your stroller without the car seat.
You have become quite the entertainer, and I often refer to you as my cheese-ball. Everyone comments on what a fun personality you have….which only worries me for when you are older and that personality becomes a wide open toddler!
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You enjoy being outdoors, and we often sit outside on the porch and just watch the world go by together.
Daddy took you to your first ECU event. On April 14 I had to work and so you, Daddy and Boppa loaded up the car and went to Greenville for the spring football game. He is so excited to share his love of college sports with you and for you two to go to many more games together. I was so proud of him for taking you by himself, and you did so well!
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We love you so so much and are so blessed by the joy you bring to our lives. I can’t wait to see what happens next month!

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

our capacity to love

Yesterday I wrote a post about desperately needing some alone time to recharge my mommy battery. I know we all hit points like this in our lives, and it seems like every time I do it one, God is so faithful in taking my weakened spirit and giving it the boost it needs. Yesterday was just that day. Landon and I had an amazing day together. The past week or so he has been a little bit more needy than usual, and yesterday he was back to his happy and cooperative self. I was even able to get him to nap in his crib (which has been a challenge). That allowed me to get outside, sit in the sunshine, and just vegetate. That night Landon went to be a little earlier than usual, which allowed John and I to have an impromptu date night in. We cooked a delicious dinner, sat on the deck and enjoyed our meal under a gorgeous night sky. It was just what we needed. Time to unwind, relax, and finally have a meal uninterrupted.

At one point I glanced up at the stars, and was able to breath deep His goodness. I have a long history of having these moments with Him. When I was in high school, I went to Young Life camp at Windy Gap in the mountains of North Carolina. When you go to camp, you have the chance to hear the gospel.  On the night where they tell the story of how Christ died for us, they send you outside to have quiet time with God, soaking in His love under a gorgeous starry sky. It is breathtaking, and always brought peace to my soul. Even now on early mornings when it is so hard to get up and go to work, I will glance upward and see His beautiful display. It is always a reminder of His constant watch over my heart, and I always catch myself taking a deep breath and just being still for a few seconds. Maybe its not alone time I really have been craving, but just a moment of stillness….


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Despite what I wrote yesterday, I am so thankful for the blessings He has given me in my husband and son. They are my joy. Last year I remember feeling like God was going to teach me how to love in such a way that I had never loved before. I can honestly say now looking back over the past year, He has showed me exactly that. I never knew I had the capacity to love so intensely, so deeply, so fully. I never knew my heart could ache with the love that I have for my family. I never knew that the way I love my son would move me to tears.

When I hit points like I did yesterday, He is so faithful in reminding me of that love. And while I still would love some mommy time, I am okay. I was given the moment of stillness that my soul so desperately needed.

I also read this great post on those moments in motherhood at Ann Voskamp’s website and just wanted to share it.

I figured I’d also share a couple cutie-patootie pictures of my little man yesterday…

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I found this little ball cap at Hobby Lobby for two whole dollars…and it just makes me laugh seeing him in it.

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And this picture was after bath time in his doggy towel…he is such a cheeseball!

Happy Tuesday :)

Monday, April 16, 2012

that little booger called guilt

I have read so many posts and articles during my pregnancy and since having Landon regarding the whole stay at home mom versus working mom debate. Prior to going back to work I really battled with the idea of being away from Landon. John and I looked into ways for me to possibly cut back hours and have more time with him, but ultimately we decided it was best if I stayed full time in my job at the hospital. The first few weeks of work, I felt great. I was running on adrenaline, I had it in my mind that I could do this. I could have the energy to give my everything at the hospital for twelve hours, and come home and keep my energy for my baby and husband. And I have. But I’ll share a secret….

I’ve been back to work for a month now, and I. am. tired.
It’s sinking in that this is my new norm, and its hard. However, I like to believe that I can do it all. (Even if that’s not really true).

I am realizing that I am a caregiver 24/7. At work I am a caregiver to five patients and help them with everything from things as simple as a puzzle to things as serious as chemotherapy, biopsies, and test results. I come home and I am a caregiver. I walk in the door and immediately take my son, feed him, change him and put him to bed. And then after all that is said and done I try to spend some quality time with my husband before turning into bed.

I am hitting  a point in motherhood where I NEED some alone time.
 I need just a couple hours to do absolutely nothing if I so choose. I am sure you other mommies out there relate to this fully, and even non mommies, at some point we just reach a point where we need a quick break.

And then that little booger called guilt creeps in.

I hate that word. And even more so I hate that emotion. But nevertheless, it is something I deal with.

As much as I would love some alone time, I can’t help but feel guilty for leaving Landon more than I really have to. I leave him all day for three days a week while I work, and it tears me up that I would have to leave him again in order for me to have that time. I am worried I will miss something, or miss him. When I go to work I miss him like crazy, so why would I drop him off when I could have him all to myself? And If John watches him, then I am missing out on family time we could have. I hate to leave him anymore than I already do, and I love every single second that I can spend with him, and so I feel guilty for wanting time to myself. Not to mention I’m sure the whole time I am away from him I would be consumed with when I get to pick him up or see him again.

So that’s where I’m at, I’m at the point where I love my child so much and don’t want to be away from him for a single second…but at the same time desperately need some time to myself.

How do you experienced momma’s balance time with your children, work, time for your marriage, and time for yourself?

I’ll let you know how it all turns out.

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Until then, today I will love my child, try to sneak a few minutes of peace during his nap, and enjoy the fact that I am so blessed by my son and husband.

Happy Monday!

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

WW / Easter Babies

The cousins, all in matching yellow seersucker, on Easter!

Sam (on the left) is exactly three weeks younger than Landon. He and Macy are my niece and nephew. Let me tell you, I am surprised this little photo shoot went so well! Both babies are rarely happy and awake at the same time, so picture opportunities are rare. Those first few weeks with both of them it seemed like someone was always crying, eating, sleeping, or having a diaper changed, and we could never get them all together for a good picture. Unfortunately we couldn’t get the little guys to look at the camera…oh well. What can ya do?


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Happy Wednesday!

Sunday, April 8, 2012

Stuck on Saturday

I think this Easter has really taught me something, something different than previously. It is easy to just go through the motions of major holidays, listening to the same scripture over and over again. But sometimes…it hits us differently. In a new way.

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This Easter, I learned a lot about the three separate days of Christ’s death, burial, and resurrection. We know the story of his death, how on Friday he sacrificed his life for us. Then was laid in the tomb and rose again on Sunday. But what happened on Saturday. Saturday consisted of a lot of darkness. It was without hope, without courage, and had a lot of fear. But Sunday…Sunday came with glory. Renewed, certain hope in the Lord, courage in the Savior, and freedom from fear. I like to think that I live like a “Sunday” person…but the truth is, the majority of the time I don’t.

The majority of the time, I’m stuck on Saturday. Stuck in the mentality that God can’t possibly care for me, or hear my heart. My hope is weak, my courage non existent, and my fear at the forefront of my heart.

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So this Easter, I’m learning to be live on Sunday…to live fully in the promise of the cross, that He died so I can live freely from that all encompassing fear. Full of Hope. Full of Courage. Full of Him.

 

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead... 1 Peter 1:3

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Living He loved me

Dying He saved me

Buried He carried

My sins far away

Rising He justified

Freely Forever

One day He’s coming

Oh Glorious Day…

-Casting Crowns.

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Eyes / Paper Mama Photo Challenge


John and both of our moms have blue eyes, so I just secretly hoped that Landon would have some baby blues of his own. I love them, and just hope they stay that way!

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Linking up with The Paper Mama


The Paper Mama Photo Challenge

I don’t get much done…

 

…on my days off. Because 90% of the time I get distracted by all this cuteness, and can’t resist a photo opportunity. For instance, my intention could be to pick up in the guest room…but instead I realize I have nice white sheets to lay Landon on and snap a few pictures. Then I need to upload, edit, and drool over said pictures (as if Landon didn’t do enough drooling already, but that’s beside the point). And the guest room still sits messy.

Oh well. :)

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linking up for Wordless Wednesday with Naptime Momtog, Jenni from the Blog,

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Quarterly Top Five

I love that I can finally join in on this quarterly top five challenge with pictures of my child! My photo folders are FULL on my computer of pictures of this little nugget of mine….and it is so hard to pick my favorites, but here they are in no particular order.

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It was so important to me to capture his sweet newborn details, so I tried and tried to get every ounce of his little body in images. This one is one of my favorites- his sweet hairswirl that has since fallen out. I knew it would be gone before too long and jumped at the chance to get a few shots of it to remember.


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Tiny Yawns…I got the biggest kick out of his yawns the first few weeks of life. He yawned SO. BIG. I really would crack up everytime and just waited for him to yawn again so I could enjoy the moment.


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Three Weeks Old. I took this one evening when Landon was finally in a deep sleep. That third week was rough, and consisted of a lot of tears, and cluster feeding, and not  a lot of sleep or peaceful moments, so I attempted to take a few sleepy baby pictures when he finally dozed off. I really don’t have many sleeping baby pictures because he is such an alert little thing, so I love this one.


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Sweet toes…it was so important to me to get pictures of his little details, like his hair swirl, and toes, and little bum. I love love love those sweet baby toes.


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I’m not sure why I love this one so much- other than that I just think he is so dang cute. I love those sweet cheeks, and the expression on his face…it just makes me melt looking at this picture of him.

So there ya have it…my first quarterly top five! What a crazy, amazing, three months it has been. I look forward to capturing the milestones he hits over the next few months.


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