Saturday, July 14, 2012

saturday mornings are the cure for everything

I have had a rough couple of weeks. I’ve been in a funk of sorts. I’ve struggled at work, really struggled. I haven’t struggled to do my job necessarily, but I have struggled to give my patients 110% of myself and show them the compassion and patience that they require. I work in a very challenging environment. My patients are REALLY really sick. I’ve dealt with a couple not very nice patients who gripe and complain about everything, and I’ve dealt with a couple that it seems like they just need you every five minutes for something. It has really worn me down. I noticed that my attitude was really bad at work, I didn’t want to be there. Every time my patients called out for something I rolled my eyes almost immediately and grumbled about them needing nausea or pain medicine. (Yes, I know I sound like the most amazing nurse ever right now). It seems like each day I have gone to work I have simply wanted to cry. Its been more demanding than usual, required more out of me, and frankly all I have wanted is to be at home with my sweet boy, rather than at the hospital caring for people I really don’t even know. Instead, I was at work for over 12 hours, not getting home until 8pm or later and only seeing Landon for maybe 15 minutes before putting him to bed.

I think the icing on the cake is that I was fully aware of how childish I was acting. I had a bad attitude and was fully aware of it. I needed to get out of my rut.

Thank God for a rainy week and Saturday Mornings…

It has been cloudy and rainy this week. I know you are wondering what in the world that has to do with my rut. But it has been the most amazing blessing and break from the sun and heat we have been having in our area. It has allowed me to stay inside, cuddle, and enjoy the downtime. In the strangest way it has really calmed my spirit and restored a peace.

This morning we woke up to clouds and rain, we brought our sweet boy in from his crib to lay in the bed with us. We spent Saturday morning in our pjs, in the bed, as a family. And it was perfect. It was exactly what my broken spirit needed. And it has made me so very thankful. So I figured I’d just share a few things that I really am thankful for in the midst of some really difficult weeks for me.

 

I’m am so very thankful…

for those 10-15 minutes I get to see my baby boy each evening after work.

that I only work three days a week, no matter how hard or long they may be.

for a husband that cooks dinner and vacuums when I have to work the weekend

for clouds and rain and lower temperatures

for sweet baby babbles that are music to my ears

that I am not the patient, but the nurse. I do get to leave at night and come home to my family, unlike them.

for a lesson in humility, and for God giving me a reality check about my attitude

for Cassie, a friend at work, who can always carry on a good conversation

laughter in difficult situations

for working hard for a patient, and seeing a good outcome.

for blueberries and raspberries and mango yumminess.

for being in bed at 9:30

for homemade baby food and the money it saves (seriously…)

for weekends with no plans, no where to go, nothing to do.

for learning to have a kinder, more gentle spirit

What are you thankful for this weekend?

 

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